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| jomara Member Since: 26 Oct 2009 Location: Lanarkshire Posts: 1790   
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 2014 110 2.2TDCi XS Station wagon
1971 Bowler Tomcat 88 4.2 V8 Auto 2022 110 D250 XS Edition - Gone 2024 110 D250 X-Dynamic HSE |
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29th May 2015 7:05pm |
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| Laurie Member Since: 22 Feb 2008 Location: Sussex, England Posts: 2897  
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Admin note: this post has had its images recovered from a money grabbing photo hosting site and reinstated  |
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30th May 2015 10:07am |
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| Venomator Member Since: 25 Aug 2014 Location: Peterborough Posts: 2087 
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 Rog...
The GREEN One... MY2016 Urban Truck Build Thread - http://www.defender2.net/forum/topic40548....al[/color] |
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3rd Jun 2015 7:26am |
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| Venomator Member Since: 25 Aug 2014 Location: Peterborough Posts: 2087
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Click image to enlarge As far as woodpeckers go....this has got to be the largest!! Well, what did you expect from me? A picture of a damn bird!? Rog...
The GREEN One... MY2016 Urban Truck Build Thread - http://www.defender2.net/forum/topic40548....al[/color] |
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3rd Jun 2015 7:28am |
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| jomara Member Since: 26 Oct 2009 Location: Lanarkshire Posts: 1790
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2014 110 2.2TDCi XS Station wagon
1971 Bowler Tomcat 88 4.2 V8 Auto 2022 110 D250 XS Edition - Gone 2024 110 D250 X-Dynamic HSE |
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3rd Jun 2015 9:01am |
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| jonny2tanx Member Since: 06 Jul 2014 Location: Harpenden, Herts Posts: 156 
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Read this out to the other half. Managed to get half way through the second line of the text message before she asked who is Paula? And she was being serious, even when it wasn't me in hospital!  |
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3rd Jun 2015 6:25pm |
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| Laurie Member Since: 22 Feb 2008 Location: Sussex, England Posts: 2897
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As I have grown older I've learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but p***ing everyone off is a piece of cake.
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4th Jun 2015 11:38am |
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| OCD Member Since: 24 Feb 2015 Location: Cheshire Posts: 52
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Click image to enlarge |
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4th Jun 2015 2:29pm |
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| shaggydog Member Since: 12 Aug 2012 Location: Kent Posts: 3347 
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It is impossible to run on a camp site, you can only ran as its past tents..... Running Restoration Thread http://www.defender2.net/forum/post323197.html#323197
Self confessed mileage hunter  |
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5th Jun 2015 9:26pm |
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| ZeDefender Member Since: 15 Sep 2011 Location: Munich Posts: 4731  
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A man walks into a shoe shop and asks the assistant for any shoes in size nine.
Puzzled, the assistant looks down and says "but sir, I'd say you are at least a ten and a half?" The man pauses for a second and then, with a dejected look on his face replies "Look, my wife has left me, my son's in prison and my daughter has run off with a drug dealer. To top it all I hate my job too. So the only thing I can look forward to at the end of the day is taking off my shoes". Tell someone you love them today because life is short. But shout it at them in German because life is also terrifying and confusing... |
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14th Jun 2015 1:18pm |
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| Laurie Member Since: 22 Feb 2008 Location: Sussex, England Posts: 2897
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The Sun has printed a full page tribute to Christopher Lee but he didn't appear in the Mirror.
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15th Jun 2015 12:33am |
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| Laurie Member Since: 22 Feb 2008 Location: Sussex, England Posts: 2897
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Click image to enlarge |
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20th Jun 2015 10:52am |
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| OCD Member Since: 24 Feb 2015 Location: Cheshire Posts: 52
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I quit my job as a human cannon ball yesterday. My boss was quite upset & told me that he didn't know where he was going to find a replacement of my calibre.
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20th Jun 2015 11:22am |
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| Laurie Member Since: 22 Feb 2008 Location: Sussex, England Posts: 2897
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A farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks.
So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster, named Kenny. He'll service every chicken you got, no problem. Kenny the rooster costs $3,000." A lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Kenny. The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first he gave the rooster a pep talk. "I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle Kenny seems to understand, so the farmer points toward the hen house and Kenny takes off like a shot. WHAM! Kenny nails every hen in the hen house three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that, the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen and, sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese down by the lake. Once again - WHAM! He gets all the geese. By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next morning to find Kenny on his back out in the middle of the yard, mouth open, tongue hanging out and both feet sticking straight up in the air. Buzzards are circling overhead. The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colorful and expensive animal, shakes his head and says, "Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself!" Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the buzzards circling in the sky and says, "Shhhh .. they're getting closer." |
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21st Jun 2015 12:47am |
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