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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4722
Ireland 
Wife's knickers were stolen off the clothes line. I'm amazed that the thief took the twenty clothes pegs as well. Whistle 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #142599 30th Apr 2012 4:38pm
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chiefstoker



Member Since: 11 Oct 2010
Location: Weston-super-Mud
Posts: 897
England 2005 Defender 90 Td5 HT Zambezi Silver
I love the amount of sex I'm getting with all the women at work in my new job

....... Infact, its one of the main reasons I became an undertaker in the first place 2005 TD5 90 Hard Top

Beer 'n Sex 'n Chips 'n Gravy

Post #142615 30th Apr 2012 6:52pm
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Killer90
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Member Since: 09 Oct 2011
Location: Hertfordshire
Posts: 6478
United Kingdom 2016 Defender 110 Puma 2.2 XS DCPU Fuji White
Quote:

I love the amount of sex I'm getting with all the women at work in my new job

....... Infact, its one of the main reasons I became an undertaker in the first place


nooooooo! Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter
Post #142621 30th Apr 2012 6:56pm
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Killer90
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Member Since: 09 Oct 2011
Location: Hertfordshire
Posts: 6478
United Kingdom 2016 Defender 110 Puma 2.2 XS DCPU Fuji White
My wife came in complaining that I never lift a finger around the house.

So I did.

The middle one. Thumbs Up


When James Bond is out of his home country of England, he is known as +44 07
Post #142623 30th Apr 2012 6:57pm
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chiefstoker



Member Since: 11 Oct 2010
Location: Weston-super-Mud
Posts: 897
England 2005 Defender 90 Td5 HT Zambezi Silver
Killer90 wrote:
My wife came in complaining that I never lift a finger around the house.

So I did.

The middle one. Thumbs Up


When James Bond is out of his home country of England, he is known as +44 07



I have a similar one to that Killer:

I said to my wife the other day 'When I die i'm going to leave everything to you'



She said 'You do anyway you fat lazy b**tard!' 2005 TD5 90 Hard Top

Beer 'n Sex 'n Chips 'n Gravy

Post #142630 30th Apr 2012 7:34pm
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Killer90
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Member Since: 09 Oct 2011
Location: Hertfordshire
Posts: 6478
United Kingdom 2016 Defender 110 Puma 2.2 XS DCPU Fuji White
Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter classic love it Laughing Thumbs Up
Post #142633 30th Apr 2012 7:41pm
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xatzhs



Member Since: 12 Dec 2010
Location: Northumberland & Down South
Posts: 258
United Kingdom 2007 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 XS CSW Java Black
Don't you just hate it when you're wiping and your finger goes through the toilet paper and gets covered in sh!t?!






...Other than that I love my new job at the retirement home!
Post #142657 30th Apr 2012 9:18pm
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bpman



Member Since: 21 May 2008
Location: Oslo
Posts: 8069
2008 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 SVX Station Wagon Santorini Black
xatzhs wrote:
Don't you just hate it when you're wiping and your finger goes through the toilet paper and gets covered in sh!t?!






...Other than that I love my new job at the retirement home!


Shocked Rolling with laughter
Post #142678 1st May 2012 6:23am
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chiefstoker



Member Since: 11 Oct 2010
Location: Weston-super-Mud
Posts: 897
England 2005 Defender 90 Td5 HT Zambezi Silver
So, Chris Martin finally reveals his 10 year hearing torment .......... that's rich coming from him after what he's been inflicting on us for the last 10yrs 2005 TD5 90 Hard Top

Beer 'n Sex 'n Chips 'n Gravy

Post #143290 4th May 2012 5:46am
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party monkey



Member Since: 31 Dec 2010
Location: Oxon.
Posts: 1311
England 2005 Defender 110 Td5 XS CSW Cairns Blue
May the fourth be with you Thumbs Up Jon - 110 td5 [sold]. Currently Defenderless.
Post #143297 4th May 2012 6:58am
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bpman



Member Since: 21 May 2008
Location: Oslo
Posts: 8069
2008 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 SVX Station Wagon Santorini Black
party monkey wrote:
May the fourth be with you Thumbs Up
Post #143314 4th May 2012 8:19am
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bpman



Member Since: 21 May 2008
Location: Oslo
Posts: 8069
2008 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 SVX Station Wagon Santorini Black
old boy in trouble ...


An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 in the morning
...and is asked where he is going at this time of night.
The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about
alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body,
as well as smoking and staying out late."

The officer then asks, "Really?
Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"

The man replies, "That would be my wife."
Post #143380 4th May 2012 3:35pm
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chiefstoker



Member Since: 11 Oct 2010
Location: Weston-super-Mud
Posts: 897
England 2005 Defender 90 Td5 HT Zambezi Silver
I was pretty excited when my girlfriend sent me a text claiming that she loves anal.......... dyslexic bitch! it turns out she loves Alan my best mate 2005 TD5 90 Hard Top

Beer 'n Sex 'n Chips 'n Gravy

Post #143432 4th May 2012 7:43pm
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spudfan



Member Since: 10 Sep 2007
Location: Co Donegal
Posts: 4722
Ireland 
Hello, can you tell me where the nearest dentist is?
Yes, down the road on the left. You can't miss it-you'll see the plaque on the wall.
.......................................................................................................................
Heard about the so called "underwear bomber" on the news? Well I saw some lingerie in a shop that was pretty explosive. 1982 88" 2.25 diesel
1992 110 200tdi csw -Zikali
2008 110 2.4 tdci csw-Zulu
2011 110 2.4 tdci csw-Masai
Post #144383 10th May 2012 4:18pm
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farmer giles



Member Since: 09 Feb 2011
Location: worcestershire
Posts: 1299
2011 Defender 110 Puma 2.4 SW Cairns Blue
what do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?




full!
Post #144459 11th May 2012 8:49am
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