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| bpman Member Since: 21 May 2008 Location: Oslo Posts: 8069  
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As a young boy, Joe was completely obsessed with tractors. He had pictures of tractors all over his bedroom walls; he had tractor toys,tractor T-shirts, a tractor carpet, and duvet cover, the whole works. He ate, drank and slept tractors.
On his 17th birthday he was thrilled to get an invitation to go to a tractor factory nearby and test-drive a brand new tractor. His excitement was incredible as he told his family and friends. The great day came and he went to the factory for the test-drive. Unfortunately something went terribly wrong with the tractor when Joe was driving it and it flipped over, trapping and breaking Joe's leg and fracturing his skull. He was so upset and tried to sue the tractor company for negligence. But the company would have none of it and told him there was no liability and he could get lost! You can imagine he was rather p****d off with tractors after this and vowed to shed them from his life completely and forever. All the posters came down, the toys were given away - tractors were GONE. Many years later, Joe went into a bar for a drink. Inside, the cigarette and cigar smoke was terrible but through it he saw a beautiful girl seated at the bar on her own. Tears were streaming down her face. Joe asked her what was wrong and she said that the smoke was making her eyes sting and stream with tears. With that, Joe looked around and then took a huge breath, sucking in all the smoke. He then walked outside into the car park and blew all the smoke out again. He went back into the bar where the air was now clear and sweet and sits down next to the girl. "That was amazing!" she said, "How did you do that?" "No problem", said Joe "I'm an extractor fan" |
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28th Oct 2011 6:41am |
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| GREENI Member Since: 22 Aug 2010 Location: staffs Posts: 10383 
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Mint! |
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28th Oct 2011 7:33am |
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| rossy Member Since: 29 Nov 2010 Location: Co. Roscommon Posts: 1296  
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heard my neighbour dropped his box of scrabble all over the road so I asked him 'whats the word on the street, man?'
(just jumping on the corny bandwagon!) |
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28th Oct 2011 7:57am |
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| Small Clanger Member Since: 22 Jun 2011 Location: UK Posts: 210
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By a coincidence, news just in, someone has planted a bomb in the Scrabble factory. If it goes off it could spell disaster.
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28th Oct 2011 5:19pm |
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| ZeDefender Member Since: 15 Sep 2011 Location: Munich Posts: 4731  
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 I've died and gone to... this forum Tell someone you love them today because life is short.
But shout it at them in German because life is also terrifying and confusing... |
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28th Oct 2011 9:54pm |
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| stanley Member Since: 18 Sep 2009 Location: Dorset /hampshire Posts: 1033 
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Police today raided kermit's lily pad and found hundreds of naked pictures of Miss Piggy on his computer, they say its the worst case of frogs porn they have ever seen
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31st Oct 2011 11:56am |
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| ZeDefender Member Since: 15 Sep 2011 Location: Munich Posts: 4731
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Some Afghan children were in the playground at the "Taliban School for Young Terrorists" when one of them suddenly exploded... Everyone seemed to ignore this except a old man sitting nearby who turned to his friend and said "Aach! Kids these days, they blow up too fast!"
Apologies  Tell someone you love them today because life is short.
But shout it at them in German because life is also terrifying and confusing... |
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31st Oct 2011 2:28pm |
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